Tuesday, February 07, 2006

15 Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity

(I thought this was appropriate considering the name of my blog!)

At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

Put your garbage can on your desk and label it as your "in" box.

Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

In the memo field of all your checks, write "for smuggling diamonds".

Finish all your sentences with, "in accordance with the prophecy".

As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat - with a serious face.

Specify that your drive-through order is "to go".

Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day at work.

Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.

Have your coworkers address you by your wrestling name, Rock Bottom.

When your money comes out of the ATM, scream, "I won! I won!"

Tell your children over dinner, that "due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."

19 Comments:

Blogger TwistedPain Opined...

Hahahaha. I've seen all of them but the Diet Water one. I WILL be using that one today at lunch. Hoooooah! Good catch sweetpea.

-TwistedInsanity

February 07, 2006 10:32 AM  
Blogger Jinsane Opined...

Yeah - I'd seen most of them too, but that one really made my laugh out loud.

I also like the one about ending your sentences with "according to the prophecy". Too funny! ;o)

February 07, 2006 10:41 AM  
Blogger Neo Opined...

Jen - LOL!!

February 07, 2006 11:52 AM  
Blogger Jinsane Opined...

Neo - It's nice to have something to laugh at once in a while, no?

February 07, 2006 12:00 PM  
Blogger SkyeBlue2U Opined...

Not that I'm paranoid but I alsways say , "want fries with that", I like the diet water. hahahahaha :)

February 07, 2006 12:09 PM  
Blogger Jinsane Opined...

Sag Sis: I love anything that's totally Smart Ass! LOL

February 07, 2006 12:11 PM  
Blogger Ellen Opined...

These are great! I haven't heard any of them (guess I've been living in a cave or something)... and can't wait to use them.

Thanks for the laugh!... and yes, we do need them, and often.

February 07, 2006 12:16 PM  
Blogger Jinsane Opined...

Ellen - let me know how they work for you! ;o)

February 07, 2006 12:22 PM  
Blogger nelle Opined...

in accordance with the prophecy...i might have to use that!

February 07, 2006 1:04 PM  
Blogger Jinsane Opined...

EJ: That's one of my faves also!

February 07, 2006 1:33 PM  
Blogger Neo Opined...

Jen -Aye. :) I'll usually head into the bathroom and look at myself in the mirror. ;)

February 07, 2006 2:07 PM  
Blogger Jinsane Opined...

Neo - Ahh....the laughs just keep on coming!

February 07, 2006 2:38 PM  
Blogger Neo Opined...

Jen - LOL, wait.. a minute...

Neo looks at Jen

Was that a rip on me?

February 07, 2006 3:08 PM  
Blogger Jinsane Opined...

Neo - No! I just meant your funny comments, keep coming.

*Don't get a complex*

February 07, 2006 3:19 PM  
Blogger Neo Opined...

Neo mumbles to himself

Jen - What complex?

February 07, 2006 4:24 PM  
Blogger Cowboy Opined...

Hilarious, Jen! Do you do these on a regular basis?

February 07, 2006 4:49 PM  
Blogger Jinsane Opined...

Neo - God Love Ya!

Nilo - I try to....but sometimes by conscience gets the better of me! LOL

February 07, 2006 5:16 PM  
Blogger cityman05 Opined...

I like to go into the dressing rooms at Wal Mart and yell, "Hey, we're out of toilet paper in here!"

February 07, 2006 5:27 PM  
Blogger Jinsane Opined...

Kippy: The sad thing is, that I can actually see you doing this! LOL

February 08, 2006 11:13 AM  

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