Monday, November 14, 2005

Obligatory Redneck Post

Things That You Will Never Hear a Southern Boy Say:

"Oh, I just couldn't, she's only sixteen."

"Duct tape won't fix that."

"Come to think of it, I'll have a Heineken."

"We don't keep firearms in this house."

"You can't feed THAT to the dog."

"No kids in the back of the pickup, it's just not safe."

"Pro wrestling is fake."

"We're vegetarians."

"Do you think my gut is too big?"

"I'll have grapefruit and orange juice instead of biscuits and gravy."

"Honey, we don't need another dog."

"Who cares who won the Civil War?"

"Give me the small bag of pork rinds."

"Too many deer heads detract from the decor."

"I just couldn't find a thing at Wal-Mart today."

"Trim the fat off that steak, please."

"Cappuccino tastes better than espresso."

"The tires on that truck are WAY too big."

"I've got it all saved on the C: drive."

"Unsweetened tea tastes better."

"My fiancee' is registered at Tiffany's."

"I've got two cases of Zima for the Super Bowl."


"She's too young to be wearing a bikini."

"Hey, there's an episode of "Hee Haw" I haven't seen!"

"Those shorts ought to be a little longer, Betty Mae."

"Nah. No more for me, I'm drivin'."

"I'll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex."


Blogger TwistedPain Opined...

You know there are only about 5 of them I can say I have said. Especially the techincal ones since I'm in IT. Other than those aformentioned 5... Yeee Hawwwww

November 14, 2005 1:25 PM  
Blogger Neo Opined...

Jen - Good list!

Neo whips out his banjo

*twang twange twange*

November 14, 2005 1:47 PM  
Blogger Jinsane Opined...

Twisty: Hootie Hoo!!!

Neo: Thanks - I can actually hear you playing right now. I think I might take a break and kick up my heals and start "shuckin & jivin"!!!

November 14, 2005 1:51 PM  
Blogger cityman05 Opined...

Oh yeah, we gotta have that fat on our meat.LOL. I actually like to take the fried fat and put it on my buscuit and make a fat sandwich. MMMMMM.


November 14, 2005 5:26 PM  
Blogger Jinsane Opined...

CM: That's gross.

My favorite was the "Jeopardy Line". I was cracking up.

November 14, 2005 7:48 PM  

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